Wednesday 14 January 2009

Old Knudsen The Pimping Playa


Every year I say fuck the Irish blog awards and then when they cum around I say "Top 'o' the mornin to ya" like some skanky hoor trying to get a fix off her pimp.

On my news blog I have on my sidebar Irish Blog Awards two time loser I believe it is time to make it three time loser.

I need a champion to go RIGHT HERE and nominate me in either the best humour blog or best blog post of 2008. Not that I'm funny or had any good posts last year but still.

Now don't make me yet again go in under an assumed name to nominate myself as a bit of my blackened dead soul breaks off every time I do.

Here is a joke I poached from the Interweb to qualify as a humour blog.


One fine sunny morning, the priest took a walk in the local forest. He had been walking by the small stream when he noticed a sad, sad looking frog sitting on a toadstool. "What's wrong with you?" said the priest.

"Well," said the frog, "the reason I am so sad on this fine day is because I wasn't always a frog." "Really!" said the priest. "Can you explain!"

"Once upon a time I was an 11 year old choirboy at the local church. I too was walking through this forest when I was confronted by the wicked witch of the forest. 'Let me pass!' I yelled, but to no avail. She called me a cheeky little boy and with a flash of her wand, turned me into this frog you see before you."

"That's an incredible story" said the priest. "Is there no way of reversing this spell that the witch has cast upon you?"

"Yes" said the frog, "It is said, that if a nice kind person would pick me up, take me home, give me food & Warmth and with a good nights sleep would wake up a boy once again."

"Today's your lucky day!" said the priest, and picked up the frog and took him home. The priest gave the frog lots of food, placed him by the fire and at bedtime put the frog on the pillow beside him. When the priest awoke, he saw the 11-year-old choirboy beside him in bed,

"And that Judge is the case for the Defence..."





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9 comments:

Momentary Madness said...

I did that and wish you the very best man.

Anonymous said...

Irish bloke award - what can you win? A crate of Guiness and a sack of pootatoes? Recognition? But OK baby - we already KNOW that you're the Greatest Blogger Alive!

(Whether you will ever make it in the rankings? NO WAY Dude .... :)

The Mistress said...

So the Golden BOG Award wasn't good enough for ya?

Old Knudsen said...

daisy it was for yer own good, what if I died and you hadn't? I'm old ya know.

MM you are a golden bogtrotting champion like Daisy but with facial hair.

mago I want to take the Irish doon from inside, er I mean potatoes to be sure etc.

MJ my shit smells like copper not gold I just can't relate to it.

Romeo Morningwood said...

You ARE the funniest Blogger in the world..
I'll be voting for you...often.

MarlaSinger said...

I had an engineer named kim knudsen send me some stuff the other day... could you be her da perhaps?

anyways, I voted for you scumbag.

you know we love you.

also, does this mean your a 12 yr old boy?

Manuel said...

me n you both old chum!

The Mistress said...

Is there a category for hairiest arse?

Then too bad 'cause Manuel wins it.

Old Knudsen said...

DC such high praise cuming from you but yer right.

tachae Ah Kim I might have one named that, if you loved me you'd...........

manuel I'll vote for you.


I'm lying of course.

MJ he has a real man's arse, damn my smooth buttocks.