Old Knudsen gets at least 50 or 60 e-mails a day. Many want to increase his penis size or sell him something and then there are some sent by his adoring fans.
I only post what my fans say to me in e-mails if I have their permission as I am a man of honour and principle unless you count the time when I posted about the personal itches of MJ that even I wouldn't scratch and I am not at all picky.
Its odd that since I'm British, Scottish an Ulster/Scot or Scots/Irish whatever you can figure out or understand I tend to have more Yank and Canadian followers than fellow UK types, its always been that way I don't have a clue what the attraction is besides the obvious sexy man in a cap thang I have going on but all the same they read and continue to complain about my usage of 'U' in words such as Honour, Favourite, Neighbourhood etc etc I also spell aeroplane and aluminium get over it I'm right even when I'm wrong.
I won't give out details about this fan, I'll call him 'Bill' of Florida he says.
Dear Old Knudsen you are the only thing that makes my miserable life worthwhile if you ever stopped Blogging I'd kill myself and if you don't reply to this e-mail I'll cut myself.
Please don't think I'm a crazed loony I just want to be your best friend I have so much more to offer than those bitches who throw themselves at you like whores of Babylon .
When I read all of your 25 Blogs I like to smear peanut butter onto my penis and have my dog lick it off.
I pretend your words are meant for me, I have almost broken the code you put into your posts to send me messages but " behind tennis at rimjob execute cunt " doesn't mean much maybe I'm missing a word or two and you want me to kill Bjorn Borg this I would gladly do in your name.
I hope you respond to this e-mail I'll send it a few more times incase you don't get it. Now I have to go and read your archives yet again.
I thought the e-mail was kinda sweet in a needy way it beats the angry drunken e-mails I receive from someone who shall remain amonymous but puts a very strong case as to why he or she should get my cap if I died by using threats and swear words.
Its odd that since I'm British, Scottish an Ulster/Scot or Scots/Irish whatever you can figure out or understand I tend to have more Yank and Canadian followers than fellow UK types, its always been that way I don't have a clue what the attraction is besides the obvious sexy man in a cap thang I have going on but all the same they read and continue to complain about my usage of 'U' in words such as Honour, Favourite, Neighbourhood etc etc I also spell aeroplane and aluminium get over it I'm right even when I'm wrong.
I won't give out details about this fan, I'll call him 'Bill' of Florida he says.
Dear Old Knudsen you are the only thing that makes my miserable life worthwhile if you ever stopped Blogging I'd kill myself and if you don't reply to this e-mail I'll cut myself.
Please don't think I'm a crazed loony I just want to be your best friend I have so much more to offer than those bitches who throw themselves at you like whores of Babylon .
When I read all of your 25 Blogs I like to smear peanut butter onto my penis and have my dog lick it off.
I pretend your words are meant for me, I have almost broken the code you put into your posts to send me messages but " behind tennis at rimjob execute cunt " doesn't mean much maybe I'm missing a word or two and you want me to kill Bjorn Borg this I would gladly do in your name.
I hope you respond to this e-mail I'll send it a few more times incase you don't get it. Now I have to go and read your archives yet again.
I thought the e-mail was kinda sweet in a needy way it beats the angry drunken e-mails I receive from someone who shall remain amonymous but puts a very strong case as to why he or she should get my cap if I died by using threats and swear words.
My cap was said to be the cap worn by Jesus at the last supper and contains powerful mojo and holy piss stains, all I know is that I'm God's gift to weemen and Asian gurly-boys the cap just gives me the edge over the rest.
As I said to MJ once, "you've tried the rest now try the best" but she wasn't having any of it as she was having 'Weeman's trouble' no idea what that is so I just nodded knowingly.
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8 comments:
If I hadn't already ripped out my uterus and flung it at another blogger, I'd be aiming it for your head right now.
Your birthday's over.
I don't have to be nice to you anymore.
It's odd that since I'm a Canuck I have more Brit/Ulster-Scot/Irish fucking Fenian followers than fellow Canucks.
If I could reach you, I would hurt you.
I never drink and write emails.
I drink and use the phone. What's your number?
Boxer: His number?
Go into any public washroom and read the writing on the wall.
but now youre a yank, do you have your green card yet? you might pick up some more uk readers since youre living on the other side of the pond...
....L...
No he ain't crazy at all.....in fact I thought everbody did the peanutbutter thing.......
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Well happy belated Sweet Sixteen'th Birthday knudsen!! I hope you get allot a' P----....And from the sounds of it, that isn't anything new.....
Luv you! Sincerely, One of your blog whores....XXXX
it really was your birthday, sugar? i'm sorry i missed it! xoxo
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