Even Real Men Suffer Shrinkage

I got this e-mail yesterday:

hello again oldknudsen
That was amazing, how many orgasms did i have? I lost count.

Jennefer palma

Damn it if I didn't rack my brains to figure out who she was, I usually don't ask names as I'm afraid to commit and also I don't care. What a strange name must be foreign which narrows it doon to 3 lasses then I saw a link which lead me to this.

That poor lad having to look at those words, look at his eyebrows, hes as queer as a nine bob note, my gheydar is on full alert. I don't think it matters how big it is as his companion looks a bit dead, hey who am I to judge what hes into?

It was an advert for EliteHerbal, a penis enlargement pill that will give you an extra 4 inches, plus a increase in Girth (Width) of 20% who wouldn't want that? well I don't as I am hung like a donkey.

To prove the pill works here are the examples they give.

Before and after shots.

I want to know why the guy was taking it in the first place.

Does he want to ride Britney and actually wants her to feel something? I was like a bee in a jar with that lass.

When I see a circumnavigated cock I imagine people without eyelids, this is one freaky looking willy but like a bad haircut it won't grow back. You weemen/shirt lifters need to get a medal for the mis-shapes you put up with.

Now to slap in some Old Knudsen sense. I am a cock master, nay a cock smith, I've had one for many years and have used it wisely and extensively just as a sniper would use his rifle, yes as any good soldier would do I sleep with my weapon of love.

Those examples. How fucking stupid do they think we are? yer willy while limp changes size all the time, the greater the range of change the more chance you have of having a decent sized knob.

Look at the boy David statue, he looks secure right? that's because his tiny flaccid noodle turns into a Michelangelo Ramming monster. I want to see hard cocks stat! well actually I don't, not right now anyway.

God bless ye olde photo shoppe instant results.

Another thing I don't trust are those diet pills adverts on the telly. Some smug cunt that loves their body gets out of shape and then as they walk and talk about the product they slim doon and tone up, BOLLOCKS! its all done by computer cos if you read the small print it says this should be taken with a healthy diet plan and exercise, if you were the type of person who exercises you wouldn't be looking for magic pills.

Before taking Slimzan extra.

After taking Slimzan extra.

To quote the EliteHerbal website it tells of the benefits to having a large cock.

" Anxiety, depression and low self-esteem have no chance against a big penis and rockhard erections that last much longer than before. Women will be impressed by the hefty dick that just keeps going and men will eye the bulge in your pants with envy. Now that’s what I call turning the tables!"

For years doctors have been giving out Prozac and all the other pills, could it just be as simple as a big cock? that doesn't explain my depression unless of course unless I'm lying and my Kenny is a sexual midget. Fuck now I'm depressed, remember Old Knudsen "It looks smaller looking doon at it" yep thats my mantra