Thursday 24 May 2007

Soylent Green Is People And So Are Kebabs.

No one is horrified by the fictional tale of Sweeney Todd the demon barber of Fleet street who killed his clients and his accomplice put them into meat pies to sell. Its been a film and even a musical, the tabloid press of Fleet street are a lot more scary.


It is alleged that a 14 year-old gurl Charlene Downes was killed by Iyad Albattikhi, who owns a fast food shop on Blackpool Promenade. He joked to his friends that he chopped her up and mixed her in with the kebabs.

Mr Albattikhi and his business partner 50-year-old Mohammed Reveshi who is accused of helping dispose of the body are both Jordanian immigrants said Charlene was one of a number of gurls who like to have sex with older sandsavage type of men who worked in the fast food shops on the promenade, its the new craze it seems. All the workers at Funny Boyz fast food joint liked the white gurls and bragged about it constantly.

Charlene like so many have just disappeared off the face of the earth the case is on-going. I say on the strength of police suspicions we hang the cunts, even if we're wrong which I doubt we'll have gotten rid of child molesting kebab makers, no good cums from a kebab.

11 comments:

Foot Eater said...

You're a racist, bigoted bastard and you've got it all wrong.

It's nothing to do with their Jordanian origins. It's because they're Northerners. These people are savages. They cruise south, they bluster their way in, they charm the pants off Monica with their banter about how 'rugged' they are compared with that 'southern poof' she's going out with. Then they whisk her away in their renovated Ford Chevrolet with flames down the side and all you're left with is diesel fumes in your face and a trace of her perfume in the still Brentwood air.

Anonymous said...

Kebab? The blokes from "Murder Machine" (Americans of curse) disposed their meatpackages on the nearby junkyard. Kebab is new. Rememers a little of Harmann, famous saussage-maker in the 1920ties.

Stories like this let the gallows shine in a friendly light.

Sam, Problem-Child-Bride said...

Perhaps Monica just didn't dig cravats, you know? Maybe Croft Original gave her heartburn. Maybe the lure of an open top chevvie was more excitement than her loins could bear. Personally, I think it was the go-faster flames. They get us chickadees every time.

Northern men are lovely unless they're Noel Gallagher.

DirtyBitchSociety said...

Let God sort 'em out, I say!

Now Da, I have a question for you, c'mere, come out and play, ok?

fofufou said...

Round the grange it isn't the girls, it's the cats.

The local bin man gets 50p for every run over moggy he finds. As for live ones 75p. It's like a low grade version of The Apprentice.

Fat Sparrow said...

"who like to have sex with older sandsavage type of men who worked in the fast food shops on the promenade"

Does that get you a discount from the ethnic types, then? I'm going out on Friday for Chinese....

Anonymous said...

Knudsen, I linked ya.

Old Knudsen said...

mago yer cuming round to my way of thinking, I may refer to you as a franconian, you linked to me? you have a blog?

sam problem-child-bride maybe it was the cigarette holder and being called lovey.

I'll be back.

Anonymous said...

Yanno... If Charlene were Chinese... and folks ate kebabs made from her, I wonder:

Would they feel hungry less than an hour later?

Old Knudsen said...

medbh thats how they get rid of bodies in the film 'Snatch' thats just minging.

its you maven that would be good for business and bad for staff levels at chinese restaurants.

Anonymous said...

medbh
I tried to find out what the proces' stand is - is there already a judgment or are they still vomiting? I could not find out. The european media did just cover the beginning, but I also couild find nothing more. Could you please tell me what it is now with Piggy?